Date
by Otakubukai
Summary: Ace/Hancock fluff. Boa Hancock was just supposed to have a peaceful day. But it seems that a certain guy wants to destroy it unintentionally. Somehow. AU oneshot.


**Date**

_Boa Hancock was just supposed to have a peaceful day. But it seems that a certain guy wants to destroy it unintentionally. Somehow._

* * *

"Aah," Hancock moaned, stretching her body. Today was her day-off from work, and she was planning to just relax after all of those stress. "I guess a short nap would do, or maybe some movies." She muttered to herself with a happy smile. Hancock jumped from her soft bed and ran towards her living room. She reached for the cabinet filled with movies. All of them were organized alphabetically. Hancock is a clean freak, indeed.

Her blue eyes scanned the movies, and tapped her chin. "I wonder what to watch." She said out loud. Then her eyes caught something. **The Perfect Man**. Hancock stared at it for awhile and shrugged her shoulders, reaching for the movie. "I guess something romantic would do."

When Hancock started for her DVD player, her doorbell rang, with a knock on the door. Hancock jumped, startled. She raised a brow at the entrance, and sighed. _Probably another delivery from Grandma Nyon. _Hancock shook her head and ran towards the door.

Once her slender hand had grabbed the door handle, it flew open, making Hancock fall from her feet. _W-What the?!_ "Kyaa!" She yelped, completely surprised by the force, her butt landing on the wooden ground.

"HANCOCK!" A male voice called to her. _Huh?_ Hancock thought.

That voice. That voice sounded _familiar_. She slowly opened her eyes—which she didn't know she had closed—and saw the brother of Monkey D. Luffy, her childhood crush. And that is, "**ACE**!" Hancock shrieked. "What the hell are you doing here?!" She gave him a hard glare, a tinge of pink on her cheeks._  
_

Ace looked down on her, a blush crept on his freckled cheeks. "I... uh... well... uh... You see... um..." He trailed off as he was staring at her clothes. Noticing this, Hancock raised a brow and looked down, only to notice she was only wearing a sleeveless tank top, which showed some cleavage and was short enough to stop above her belly button. She was also wearing blue short shorts, showing off her long, creamy legs.

Hancock's eyes widened and her arms flew to her chest, glaring at Ace once again. "You _perv_!" She yelled at him, her face red from embarrassment. Ace smirked and covered his mouth with his hand, a small blush still painting his cheeks.

"Really? You're wearing something like that, and you're calling _me _a pervert? You really are something." Ace chuckled. Hancock's face got redder as it could possibly get, and gritted her teeth.

"Never mind about that! I was just enjoying my day-off from work!" Hancock stood up from the ground and angrily stomped her foot on the ground. Ace made a straight face and took a step back.

"How the hell am I supposed to know?! I didn't even have a clue!" Ace retorted, pointed a finger at her. This time, Hancock was furious. Her face wasn't red from embarrassment anymore. It's now red from anger.

"Why are you even here, anyways!?" Hancock pulled on his ear roughly, making Ace yell out in pain. "**OW! YOU CRAZY BITCH!**" He grabbed his ear and tried to soothe it._  
_

"**YOU WERE THE ONE WHO JUST DESTROYED MY DAY AND NOW YOU'RE CALLING _ME _A BITCH?! YOU ASS!**" Hancock shrieked once again, her eyes wide and angry—you know, the ones that you see on those characters who are furious shit or something. Ace's mouth hung wide open, not believing what he just heard.

"**WHAT THE HELL?! DID YOU JUST CALL ME AN _ASS?!_**" Ace retorted, still holding his ear. Then he felt a stinging pain on his left cheek. He didn't even notice it, his head was already facing on the right. Did she just—oh no, she didn't. Oh she didn't just do that, right? SHE JUST DID THAT! SHE JUST _SLAPPED _THE AWESOME AND MIGHTY **PORTGAS D. ACE**?!—It'd give more suspense if you imagined it to be Buggy's voice.

"**YOU JUST SLAPPED ME! YOU FREAKING SLAPPED ME! WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!**" Ace started shouting profanities toward her, and Hancock was still alive to talk back.

"**ME?! WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH _ME_?! ASK THAT YOURSELF, YOU BRAINLESS PIECE OF SHIT! WHY ARE YOU EVEN HERE?! WHAT IN THE WORLD IS YOUR PROBLEM?!**" Hancock's eyes were those of angry women's eyes effect we see in anime and manga.

"**MY PROBLEM?! I WASN'T EVEN DONE TALKING AND YOU PULLED ON MY EAR, GODDAMMIT!**"

"**IT'S NOT MY FAULT ANYMORE! YOU—!**" Hancock was cut off by the rowdy old neighbor she had.

"Oy! JUST SHADDUP ALREADY! YOU'RE DISTURBING THE WHOLE NEIGHBORHOOD!" The old woman screamed, throwing a slipper directly at Ace's head. Ace paused and furrowed his eyebrows. His hand reached up and rubbed his head. Hancock looked at him, and he looked back. Then both of them looked at the old woman on the other side of the fence.

"What... the... _fuck_?" Ace muttered slowly.

"IF YOU SAY **ONE **MORE WORD, I'M GONNA CALL THE COPS!" The old woman shrieked so loud, they thought her throat is gonna break. She was holding a phone, and her thin finger pointed to the number **9**.

Hancock and Ace simultaneously said, "Alright! Sheesh. Crazy old hag." And both entered the humble abode of the beautiful Boa Hancock.

.

.

**~ I'M A MOTHER FATHER GENTLEMAN ~**

.

.

Hancock has finally changed to more decent clothes. Cream-colored sweater, and white shorts with flip flops. She sat down on the sofa of her living room, with Ace sitting on the ground, his head resting on a bean bag. Hancock stared at him, while he played with his PSP he brought. "Anyway, what brought you here?" She said seriously, this time.

Ace continued playing and pressing on buttons, but after a while, paused his game and looked back up at her. "Ah?" He said plainly. A dangerous red ticking vein appeared on her head.

"I asked you a serious question, and _that's _how you answer me?! Seriously!" Hancock placed her hands on her hair, ruffling it. She stomped towards Ace and snatched his PSP from him and started kicking him. "YOU BASTARD!"

"Ow! Ow! OW!" Ace tried to cover himself up, but Hancock was hitting him everywhere. "Okay! Okay! I'm sorry! Ugh." Ace groaned and once Hancock's foot withdrew, he sighed and sat down on the bean bag.

Hancock glared at him and sat back down. "I ask you one more time. What the hell do you want?" She crossed her arms, still glaring at him.

"Food." he answered bluntly.

Hancock blinked at him, completely puzzled. "_What_?" She hissed the word dangerously. Ace, realizing his mistake, gulped loudly.

"A-A-A-A-A-A-A-Ah... I _meant_—" He wanted to explain himself, but was cut off by the furious snake.

"**FOOD**?!" She screamed at the top of her lungs. "_**FOOD**_?!"

"S-SH-SH-SHHHH! THAT HAG OF A NEIGHBOR OF YOURS IS GONNA HEAR YOU!" Ace tried to shush her, his eyes wide with fear, but Hancock was too angry to even listen to him.

"**I DON'T CARE UNTIL I KILL YOU NOW**!" Her teeth turned pointy and chased him around her lot, with him running as fast as he can, and Hancock hot on his sneakers. "**COME BACK HERE, YOU D. GORILLA**!" She yelled behind him.

"It's _Portgas D. Ace_, dammit! Get your facts right! Luffy's my **foster brother**! Not biological!" Ace yelled back at her, completely desperate to escape the beauty's wrath. And now, Ace started panting.**  
**

"**I DON'T CARE!**" She dashed towards him as fast as lightning, and when Ace couldn't take it anymore, he skidded his feet on the dirt ground. He started wheezing and breathing for oxygen. _That woman is unbelievable! _He thought. So, he squinted his eyes shut and waited for the impact. Ace was sure he wouldn't be able to take the worst pain he was going to experience. _Oh God, please let me end up alive. _Ace prayed, sweat rolling down on his face. Then, he heard shouting. "W-W-W-W-Wait!" and Ace was damn sure it was a girl. But before Ace could even open his eyes to see what happened, all he knew was he was already lying on his back on the ground, with an odd heavy pressure pressing on his body. The impact was painful. Now, where the fuck did that Hancock woman go? Ace grunted, and slowly peered through his lashes.

"...uh?" he managed to say. "Oh, sweet hell..." Ace rubbed his head with his hand. He frowned when something shifted above him. Ace's eyebrows raised at this. It felt soft... plump... and... delicate. Then Ace's eyes immediately shot open. _B-B-Breasts?! _Then his eyes looked up, and he saw Hancock's pained face.

"Ow..." Her eyes were closed and her hand was rubbing her head tenderly. When her lids opened up, she saw Ace's blank face, but blood started to trickle down from his nose. Hancock's face burned red and she gritted her teeth in anger. "AAGGHH!" She frustratingly screamed, sitting up and slapping him across the face. "You pervert!" Hancock stood up from his torso and turned her back to him.

Ace, of course, was completely taken aback. "_Whaaat_!? You were the one who crash-landed onto me!" Ace quickly wiped his nose with the back of his hand, glaring at Hancock.

"I wasn't the one who stopped in the middle of the street!"

"Then why were you speeding then?!" Ace yelled at her, while Hancock pointed behind her.

PEW! PEW! PEW! PEW! PEW!

"What the fuck was that?!"

"Cops."

"_Cops_?"

"Yes."

"What's with the sound effect?!"

"They use lasers."

"_P__ew pew pew_?"

"It seems so."

"But THERE AREN'T EVEN LASERS!"

"**HEY! YOU TWO ARE UNDER ARREST FOR DISTURBING THE PEACE OF SOCIETY!**" a police in the car yelled, sticking his head out.**  
**

Ace and Hancock's eyes widened, noticing green hair and three earrings dangling on the man's ear. "**ZORO**?!"

"Shadda-fucking-ap!" He yelled, bringing his laser gun out. **PEW! PEW! PEW! **Zoro was a new member of the East Blue Police Department Inc. Apparently.

Ace and Hancock barely avoided. "Make a run for it if you don't wanna die!" Zoro pointed his gun at the two of them.

"Thanks for the warning, _marimo_!" Ace exclaimed, running towards a dark alley. Hancock followed him, "Ah! WAIT!"

Zoro growled. "COME BACK HERE, YOU BRATS!"

.

.

**~ I'M A MOTHER FATHER GENTLEMAN ~**

.

.

"Seriously. After all that, you still manage to eat a whole lot." Hancock narrowed her eyes at the freckled man sitting across her. He was eating a bunch of meat, which Hancock was going to pay for. "You D's are unbelievable." She leaned her head on her hand, and watched the man eat. Hancock shook her head, and dragged her eyes to the window beside them. Cars were leisurely passing through, and people coming along the sidewalk, entering buildings and talking to each other—

"Can I have seconds?" Hancock's thoughts were cut off by Ace, who stretched his arm out to her with an empty bowl of rice on his hand. Hancock blinked at him and at the bowl.

"Eh?"

Ace frowned. "I said, can I have seconds?"

Hancock clicked her tongue in annoyance. "No way. I'm paying the bill."

"_Aaaaaaaaah_? Aren't you, like, being unfair?" Ace whined, raising his right eyebrow.

"Oh, shut it." Hancock hissed at him, taking out her wallet. She called the waitress for the bill, and gave Ace a hard glare. Ace blinked back at her, still chewing on his meat. His eyebrows frowned, a pout forming on his mouth.

"But—"

"No buts!"

"Huh? But—"

"I _said_."

"Wait! But I have to tell you—"

"I mean what I say. Don't even think about going against me, now shut it." Hancock sharpened her eyes at him, pointing a polished finger at him. Ace groaned and leaned on his hand. Hancock wore a smug smile, and sat back on the cushion chair.

"That's more like it." She nodded to herself. Ace just rolled his eyes, and drank on his soda.

After a few moments of silence, the waitress arrived with the bill in hand. Hancock browsed the bill and her eyes widened, her mouth open wide in shock. She stared at the total amount, and her hand shook. Ace watched her with curious eyes and leaned over to stare at the bill. But before he could even reach over, Hancock growled and smacked the bill at his face. "FOUR HUNDRED DOLLARS?!" Hancock shouted in pure rage. "HOW THE FUCK DID IT GET TO _THAT _AMOUNT!?"

Ace yelped in pain and moved back. He touched his nose, "_Four hundred what?!_" He said out loud. Hancock's face turned from enraged to _a whole lot more enraged_. Ace jumped and backed away slowly.

"**You are un-freaking-believable shithead!**" Hancock shrieked and threw a vase at him. The waitress' eyes widened and tried to stop the woman, but failed terribly. Hancock already threw the vase, and Ace barely missed it. The vase was shattered into pieces behind him.

"H-H-Hancock! I'll pay you back! I promise!" Ace stammered, shaking his hands frantically. Hancock's face calmed down a bit, but she was still walking towards him. Ace started to shiver under her wrath. _S-S-S-S-Shit! I'm gonna die!_

Hancock stopped a few meters away from him, her face going back to its normal color. "You'll pay me back?" She smiled brightly it was almost scary. Actually, it's frightening. Forget about scary.

Ace nodded his head, almost to the point of it getting off his neck. "Of course!" He exclaimed as he held her hand in his. Hancock's eyebrows rose at this and she had the urge to slap his face.

_But... but... but his hands are so warm and big~ _She thought dreamily and she paused for a moment to register what she had just told herself. A blush spread on her face. That was sudden. _Bad Hancock! You're not supposed to think that! Especially with that hoodlum of a guy._

Hancock was so in a daze she didn't even notice Ace already let go of her dainty hands. "Hancock!" He snapped her out of her thoughts.

"Y-yes?" She stammered. Damn, that's not like her.

Ace almost smirked at this.

Hancock wanted to slap that grin away from his handsome face.

_HANDSOME_? Really?

"You know, Hancock. You just have to admit that you _like _me and I'm too hot for your own good." Ace boasted with that cocky grin on his face once more. Hancock growled and she was blushing like mad again.

"_Shut up_, Portgas."

"You just like me."

"I said _shut up_, didn't I?"

"Make me."

"Stop."

"You know, it's like we're already having a date."

"SHUT UP! I MEAN, YOU SHOULD BE SCARED BY NOW!"

"Oh yeah? Well, kiss me first and I will."

"Ugh!"

* * *

**Fin**

_this story was sitting alone in my doc manager for too long so i just had to post it._


End file.
